Friday, December 4, 2009

My "Soul" Urge

Since I have been wondering about my future and where it is headed, I had a mini-numerology reading. One's Soul Urge describes what you value or want most in life. My Soul Urge number is 5. With a 5 Soul Urge, the desire to have complete freedom to be in control of your affairs is paramount in your makeup. Happiness is having the latitude to go where you want to go and do what you want to do. Tasting life in an unrestrained fashion produces a sense of fulfillment. This is what I meant the other day when I wrote about riding all the carnival rides-life is to be experienced fully!
My report says that I love change. I live to experience as much as possible in the shortest amount of time possible. I appreciate the fact that life is short and are bound and determined to make the most of every minute I have on this earth. I have an inquisitive mind and a thirst for adventure that is only slaked by the collecting of unusual experiences and plenty of travel. In fact I can't think of a bigger disservice to one's soul than to give up one's right to pursue their heart's desire. I feel smothered by individuals who define love as giving up your heart and soul for another. My definition of love is more spiritually sophisticated. I believe that an expression of true love for another soul is the courage to let them go to pursue their own path. I intrinsically understand that without change there is no evolution. This is why somehow, I end up as being the catalyst for change in many situations. Sometimes the change that my very presence provokes is constructive and good and sometimes I am the culprit that causes complete chaos. However often my motivation for revealing secrets or destroying relationships is to clear out the old and create way for the new. That is so eerie, especially in light of what is happening at work!
Most interestingly, the reading says that I am also graced with an astounding amount of courage. Like water, I have the ability to wear down obstacles like water in a stream wears down a rock over a long period of time. Although I may appear unpredictable or unreliable to others I am actually a very complex individual who often harbors a clear vision of who they want to be and how they want to live in the future. I never think of myself as courageous -tenacious, yes, courageous, no.

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