Saturday, December 19, 2009

Down for the count!

I can not tell you how wiped out I am. I couldn't be too far away from the bathroom and my back was bothering me. I could not find a comfortable position to be in so I didn't make it to Missouri for Martha's memorial service. We had planned to go but it was just too much. I only hope she understands. I'd like to think she does. With every round of chemo, the fatigue and exhaustion seem to get worse. Could it be the cumulative effect of chemo? One of the hardest aspects of ongoing chemotherapy is the constant grind. There is no counting down until the end of treatment, as another round is always right around the corner. They say the cumulative effects of chemotherapy, such as fatigue, skin changes, weight gain (due to early menopause) and dry, red eyes can be trying. However, I find the emotional wear and tear to be the biggest challenge. I am still working on accepting that resting after chemo is part of my job now and that I need to do it in order to remain alive and feeling well. And I try and savour the days when I feel healthy and strong. As I always say, Time flies when you're having cancer!

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