Please, no more poop!

Just how is it that I attract so much shit? I mean that literally. There has been so much of it in my life lately, that it caused me a major meltdown today. We discovered that the bathroom in the Deland house needs to be completely gutted as the floor has rotted. The shower and the tub are sinking into the crawl space. Seems that the shower drain came unhooked and the water is just running into the crawl space. The moisture has rotted all the wood. Better yet, the septic is on that same line and when the tank filled up, guess where it went. Yep, right into the crawl space. So, I get to put on waders and a mask and get into it so I can scoop it out. Worst of all, I had to ask the renters to move out because we can't do those repairs with people living in the house. I can't risk their health and safety. And because menopause is already making me "girly" and emotional, I just wanted to cry all day! For those who know me well, you know how much I hate that!!! I don't want to show any emotion that is considered "weak".

Money's already so tight with being unemployed that I really can't afford to lose the rent, nor do I have the extra funds to make the repairs. I'm caught in a vicious cycle-I need the rent to make the repairs, but I can't rent it without first repairing it. I have no idea what I'm going to do! It makes me wonder why I keep getting all this shit? Did I do something in a previous life to warrant all this? I like to think that I'm a good person but I seem to have all of this bad karma. I've read the book, "When Bad Things Happen to Good People" but I still don't have any answers. Again, I ask, why does god hate me so much? I tend to be a fairly optimistic person but this all makes me want to stay in bed and hide under the covers. I think that I'm soon going to need counseling and/or anti-depressants! Well, I do have derby and maybe that will keep me somewhat sane. Now everyone say it with me...No More Poop, No More Poop, No More Poop!!!